We’ll Fix It Later - The Absurd Truth About Building and Finishing a House

By Max Paradox
Listen with Sir Michael Caine™ and 1,000+ voices
Length3h 17m

About this audiobook

Building a house is supposed to be a dream. Freedom. Space. Control. This book is about what actually happens instead. We’ll Fix It Later is a sharp, painfully accurate satirical nonfiction book about the modern obsession with building and finishing a “perfect” home-and the quiet madness that comes with it. From budgets that evaporate on contact with reality, through walls that never feel straight, contractors who speak fluent uncertainty, and rooms that only make sense after you’ve stopped caring, this book captures the emotional, financial, and psychological absurdity of the entire process. This is not a guide. This is not advice. This is not motivation. It is an honest, ironic, and deeply relatable observation of what it means to build a house while slowly realizing that control is an illusion and “finished” is a myth. Perfect for: • homeowners • future builders • anyone who has ever said “it’s probably fine” and meant “I’m too tired to argue” If you’ve built a house, you’ll recognize yourself on every page. If you’re about to-this book won’t save you. But it will make you laugh when nothing else does. This publication was prepared using tools that support the creative process, including solutions based on artificial intelligence. The final concept, structure, and editing are the work of the author.

Audiobook details

GenreHumor, Other
Length3 hrs 17 mins
Narrated byListen with 1,000+ voices
FormateBook with Audio
Publish dateAug 25, 2026
LanguageEnglish

Table of contents

1INTRO
2Chapter 1 - The Decision That Felt Like Freedom
3Chapter 2 - Budget, the First Fiction
4Chapter 3 - Paperwork, or How Time Stops Meaning Anything
5Chapter 4 - The Groundbreaking That Breaks You First
Show all chapters
6Chapter 5 - Walls Appear, Confidence Disappears
7Chapter 6 - The Roof, or Hope With an Expiration Date
8Chapter 7 - Windows: Transparency Is a Lie
9Chapter 8 - Electricity: Where Logic Goes to Die
10Chapter 9 - Plumbing: Everything Is Fine Until It Isn’t
11Chapter 10 - Heating: Comfort, Explained Incorrectly
12Chapter 11 - Insulation: Paying Not to Feel Anything
13Chapter 12 - Drywall: The Art of Pretending It’s Straight
14Chapter 13 - Paint: Choosing Regret in Advance
15Chapter 14 - Floors: Living on Your Decisions
16Chapter 15 - Doors: Privacy, Negotiated Poorly
17Chapter 16 - The Bathroom: Where Optimism Goes to Steam
18Chapter 17 - The Kitchen: Dreams, Multiplied by Invoices
19Chapter 18 - Stairs: Vertical Regret, Repeated Daily
20Chapter 19 - Lighting: Mood, Ruined Systematically
21Chapter 20 - Storage: Where Space Goes to Disappear
22Chapter 21 - The Garden: Nature, but With Invoices
23Chapter 22 - Neighbors: The Final Unplanned Feature
24Chapter 23 - The Move-In: When Finished Is a Lie
25Chapter 24 - The First Winter: Reality Turns the Heating On
26Chapter 25 - The First Summer: Heat Finds Your Weak Spots
27Chapter 26 - Small Fixes That Quietly Become Permanent
28Chapter 27 - The Warranty Period: When Everything Breaks Politely
29Chapter 28 - Furniture: The Final Proof That Plans Are Fiction
30Chapter 29 - Cleaning: The Myth of a Fresh Start
31Chapter 30 - Guests: Seeing Your House Through Other People’s Eyes
32Chapter 31 - Silence: The First Time the House Stops Asking
33Chapter 32 - The First Repair You Didn’t Panic About
34Chapter 33 - When Someone Says “You’re Lucky”
35Chapter 34 - The House Becomes Invisible
36Chapter 35 - You Would Do It Again (And That’s the Real Absurdity)
The Building Association Raises the Repair Fund, and I Raise My Blood Pressure - How to Read Your Building's Budget, Ask Questions About Repairs, and Take Part in Building Decisions Without Voting Based Solely on the Latest Argument at the Owners' MeMax Paradox6h 47m$7.60
Dziecko Mówi Dwoma Językami, a Dziadkowie Mają Sto Teorii - Jak budować rodzinny plan używania języków, współpracować ze szkołą i wybierać rzetelne wsparcie bez robienia z każdej rozmowy egzaminu z dwujęzycznościMax Paradox6h 17m$7.60
My Bike Should Take Me to Work, Not Stand in the Hallway - How to Plan Your Route, Gear, Parking, and Bad-Weather Options, and Gradually Make Cycling Part of Your Everyday Commute Without Buying a Pro Cyclist Identity Along with Your HelmetMax Paradox6h 21m$7.60
Dzielimy Mieszkanie po Rodzicach i Każdy Ma Inny Kalkulator - Jak uzgadniać korzystanie z odziedziczonej nieruchomości, koszty i kierunek dalszych decyzji oraz przygotować się do mediacji bez rodzinnej licytacji na zasługiMax Paradox6h 18m$7.60
The Hearing Aid Didn't Fix Every Conversation - How to Agree on Communication Conditions with Loved Ones and Coworkers, Use Available Accommodations, and Stay Connected Without Pretending You Heard EverythingMax Paradox6h 25m$7.60
My Child Has an Allergy, and Everyone Has Good Advice and a Cookie - How to Agree on a Daily Safety Plan with Specialists, School, and Loved Ones, Share Instructions, and Organize Outings Without Explaining Everything from Scratch Every Time SomeoneMax Paradox6h 37m$7.60
I Can't Drive Anymore, but Life Is Still Twenty Kilometers Away - How to Organize Shopping, Appointments, and Social Connections After Giving Up Driving and Build a Transportation Support Network Without Letting Others Control Your Entire CalendarMax Paradox6h 30m$7.60
Nie Mogę Już Prowadzić, a Życie Nadal Jest Dwadzieścia Kilometrów Dalej - Jak zorganizować zakupy, wizyty i kontakty po rezygnacji z prowadzenia auta oraz stworzyć sieć transportowego wsparcia bez oddawania całego kalendarza innym ludziomMax Paradox6h 19m$7.60
W Domu Jest Trzydzieści Stopni, a Klimatyzacja Jest w Planach - Jak organizować mieszkanie, obowiązki i pomoc dla bardziej narażonych domowników podczas upałów oraz planować potrzebne dostosowania bez czekania na kolejne rekordowe latoMax Paradox5h 55m$7.60
My Child Has a Special Education Ruling, but the School Has Its Own Interpretation - How to Organize Recommendations, Prepare for Meetings, and Monitor Agreed Educational Accommodations Without Fighting a Daily Battle Over Every Need Your Child HasMax Paradox6h 37m$7.60
Nasze Dziecko Jest Pierwsze w Rodzinie, Które Idzie na Studia - Jak wspierać wybór uczelni, przeprowadzkę i samodzielność, poznawać akademickie zasady oraz rozmawiać o kosztach bez udawania rodzinnego doświadczenia, którego jeszcze nie maMax Paradox6h 7m$7.60
Woda Wyszła z Domu, a My Nadal Nie Wiemy, od Czego Zacząć - Jak uporządkować dokumentację szkód, zadania i dostępne wsparcie po zalaniu lub powodzi oraz planować powrót do codzienności bez podejmowania wszystkich decyzji pierwszego dniaMax Paradox6h 20m$7.60
Rodzice Się Rozwodzą, a Ja Mam Czterdzieści Lat - Jak nie zostać mediatorem, powiernikiem i kurierem pretensji, ustalić własne relacje z obojgiem rodziców oraz odnaleźć się w zmianie rodzinnego układuMax Paradox6h 12m4.6 (25)$7.60
The Heat Pump Is New, and I Still Don't Know What to Set - How to Gather Installation Documentation, Understand Basic Settings and Energy Consumption, and Work with Your Installer to Optimize Performance Without Experimenting with the Entire HeatingMax Paradox6h 31m$7.60
The Adult Child Moves Back Home and Brings Their Own Rulebook - How to Agree on Costs, Responsibilities, Privacy, and the Ground Rules for Living Together Again Without Recreating the Parent-and-Teenager DynamicMax Paradox6h 36m$7.60
Kupujemy Mieszkanie Razem, Ale Nie Jesteśmy Małżeństwem - Jak przygotować rozmowy o wkładach, odpowiedzialności i możliwym rozstaniu oraz zebrać pytania do specjalistów bez zakładania, że miłość zastępuje wszystkie ustaleniaMax Paradox6h 12m$7.60
Studiuję, Pracuję i Podobno To Ma Być Najlepszy Czas Życia - Jak łączyć wymagania uczelni z zarabianiem, planować sesję i szukać dostępnego wsparcia bez finansowania studiów wyłącznie własnym snemMax Paradox6h 28m$7.60
My Partner Is from Another Country, and Our Families Have Two Recipes for Everything - How to Navigate Traditions, Language, and Family Expectations as an Intercultural Couple Without Deciding Whose Family Is Right at Every HolidayMax Paradox6h 51m$7.60
My Father Has Fallen in Love Again, and I Have No Ready-Made Role for This - How to Talk to Your Parent About a New Relationship, Sort Through Your Emotions, and Build a Connection with His Partner Without Taking Responsibility for Other Adults' LiveMax Paradox6h 33m$7.60
We're Buying an Apartment Together, but We're Not Married - How to Discuss Contributions, Responsibilities, and a Possible Breakup, and Prepare Questions for Professionals Without Assuming Love Can Replace Clear AgreementsMax Paradox6h 35m$7.60
Lost In TranslationAudrey Davis9h 15m4.4 (235)Free
How to Test Negative for StupidJohn Kennedy8h 13m4.7 (9.7K)$28 · $0.00
The Jeeves and Wooster Stories: The Complete Collection (33 Books)P. G. Wodehouse21h 57m4.7 (2.8K)$15 · $0.00
Birdie & HarlowTaylor Wolfe7h 50m4.6 (6.5K)$26 · $0.00
The Life of DaiDai Henwood, Jaquie Brown8h 2m4.6 (790)$26 · $0.00
Welcome to PawneeJim O'Heir6h 24m4.5 (5.3K)$24 · $0.00
Going PostalTerry Pratchett13h 36m4.5 (163.8K)$33 · $0.00
Woman UninterruptedBrodie Kane7h 1m4.6 (562)$24 · $0.00
1984 & Animal Farm (Annotated)George Orwell15h 54m4.5 (220.8K)$3.99 · $0.00
Kingsblood Royal (Annotated)Sinclair Lewis14h 42m4.6 (264)$2 · $0.00
This Is Going to HurtAdam Kay5h 47m4.4 (444.7K)$24 · $0.00
You Will Get Through This NightDaniel Howell6h 56m4.4 (11.8K)$24 · $0.00
Northanger Abbey (Annotated)Jane Austen10h 7m4.5 (1.6K)$2 · $0.00
THE SCREWTAPE LETTERS & SCREWTAPE PROPOSES A TOAST (Annotated)C. S. Lewis5h 6m4.4 (471K)$2 · $0.00
The P.G. Wodehouse CollectionP.G. Wodehouse15h 43m4.4 (1.5K)$19 · $0.00
A Founding MotherStephanie Dray, Laura Kamoie17h 21m4.4 (1.4K)$33 · $0.00
BufferingHannah Hart5h 55m4.4 (12.4K)$24 · $0.00
The Office BFFsJenna Fischer, Angela Kinsey8h 26m4.3 (45.4K)$26 · $0.00
The Collected Stories of Dorothy ParkerDorothy Parker8h 36m4.3 (13.6K)$1 · $0.00
LambChristopher Moore15h 22m4.3 (211.3K)$33 · $0.00
The Holy Bible - 1 SamuelKing James2h 13m4.8 (1.6K)$3 · $0.00
The American Standard Bible — The Gospel of MatthewMatthew3h 56m4.7 (3K)$2 · $0.00
Bad Fat Black GirlSesali Bowen6h 32m4.7 (2.8K)$24 · $0.00
The King James Audio Bible New Testament CompleteChristopher Glyn20h 2m4.7 (2.6K)$10 · $0.00
Faiths CheckbookCharles Spurgeon12h 44m4.7 (3.2K)$11 · $0.00
Ten Things I Wish You Knew About Your Child's Mental HealthDr. Billy Garvey4h 53m4.7 (2.4K)$20 · $0.00
Designing Terry Pratchett’s DiscworldPaul Kidby3h 52m4.7 (343)$20 · $0.00
The Chosen Book OneAmanda Jenkins, Kristen Hendricks, Dallas Jenkins3h 8m4.6 (4.9K)$10 · $0.00
The Lives of BrianBrian Johnson9h 45m4.6 (3.5K)$29 · $0.00
Expository Thoughts on the Gospel of LukeJ.C. Ryle27h 13m4.7 (536)$18 · $0.00
CrossroadsKaleb Dahlgren7h 56m4.6 (4.9K)$26 · $0.00
Across the RiverKent Babb11h 40m4.6 (927)$29 · $0.00
Brain Training for RidersAndrea Monsarrat Waldo5h 56m4.7 (550)$19 · $0.00
My Effin' LifeGeddy Lee17h 11m4.6 (13.1K)$40 · $0.00
Kings and PawnsHoward Bryant10h 9m4.6 (678)$29 · $0.00
The Elementia Chronicles #2: The New OrderSean Fay Wolfe11h 17m4.6 (841)$29 · $0.00
The ActsLuke2h 55m4.6 (19.7K)$12 · $0.00
New Testament - Easy NavigationWorld English Bible19h 35m4.6 (1.3K)$1.30 · $0.00
Woodcraft and Camping (Annotated)George Washington Sears3h 30m4.6 (1.2K)$1.99 · $0.00
The Hate U GiveAngie Thomas11h 50m4.5 (1.1M)$8 · $0.00

You may also like

A Sentimental Journey Through France and Italy (Annotated)Laurence Sterne5h 53m3.9 (23K)$2 · $0.00
The Tragic MuseHenry James23h 25m3.8 (3.8K)$2.30
The Death of the Moth & Other EssaysVirginia Woolf8h 27m4.2 (2K)$0.99 · $0.00
OrlandoVirginia Woolf1m4.1 (173.7K)$5 · $0.00
The Awful German LanguageMark Twain59m4.1 (2.7K)$6 · $0.00
The Art of SeeingAldous Leonard Huxley5h 19m4.0 (1.8K)$1.99 · $0.00
The Life and Opinions of Tristram ShandyLaurence Sterne19h 54m3.9 (34.8K)$1.20 · $0.00
The Absurdity of Being a Programmer - A brutally honest satire about code, burnout, meetings, bugs, and the quiet madness behind the screenMax Paradox3h 47m$7.80 · $0.00
The Absurdities of Being a CEO - A Calm, Exhausting, Slightly Uncomfortable Study of Power, Responsibility, and Pretending Everything Is FineMax Paradox3h 22m$7.70 · $0.00
Apple - The Beautiful Cage - Absurdities of Owning an iPhone and Living Inside the Apple Ecosystem - From Fanboy Devotion to Quiet Digital DependenceMax Paradox4h 49m$7.80 · $0.00
The Absurdities of Travel - Why Going Somewhere Else Rarely Fixes Anything - But We Keep Doing It AnywayMax Paradox2h 58m$7.80 · $0.00
The Absurdity of Owning Android Devices - Freedom, Features, and the Mild Chaos of Living in an Open EcosystemMax Paradox3h 51m$7.80 · $0.00
The Price of Learning - Education, Debt, and Growing Up Inside the American SystemMax Paradox3h 25m$7.80 · $0.00
The Absurdities of Being an Actor - A Quietly Brutal Guide to Waiting Rooms, Almosts, and Still Showing UpMax Paradox3h 24m$7.80 · $0.00
Losing Weight, Finding Nothing - A Tired, Honest, and Slightly Uncomfortable Look at Diet Culture, Fitness Obsession, and the Wellness Industry That Never Lets You FinishMax Paradox3h 54m$7.80 · $0.00
Fitzgerald: How to Live on $36,000 a Year & How to Live on Practically Nothing a YearFrancis Scott Fitzgerald2h 29m4.0 (34)$1.99 · $0.00
The Absurdities of Being a Singer - A Tired, Honest, Uncomfortable Love Letter to a Voice That Never Does What You AskMax Paradox3h 55m$7.80 · $0.00
The Absurdities of Being a Flight Attendant - A Calm Smile at 35,000 Feet While Everyone Slowly Loses ItMax Paradox5h 16m$7.80 · $0.00
Imagine we trade bodies with sheepDUKE AL2h 21m$14 · $0.00
The Absurdities of Being a Lawyer - A Quietly Exhausting Guide to a Profession That Never Asked If You’re OkayMax Paradox4h 40m$7.80 · $0.00