Audio only
The Distress of the Sharp
The Metaphysics of C Sharp and GreaseBy Otto HandleyNarrated by Gregory DwyerLength4h 26m
About this audiobook
A metaphysical crisis occurs when the note C sharp mysteriously vanishes after being played perfectly by the pianist Jonathan Blenheim. The absence causes tonal collapse worldwide, leading to chaos in orchestras and triggering a bureaucratic panic at the Bureau of Eclectic Notation (BEN). The Bureau attempts to force the note D Flat into substitution, to be met with fierce opposition by D Flat. The narrative follows the adventures of the missing C sharp, which has been transposed into the viscosity of frying grease within Wotof Wongip’s chip shop, becoming a sentient sound that seeks resolution through “grease-touch” and memory. Ultimately, characters including Detective Fiddlefaddle, the Fryer Prophet Frank, and the adverbial entity Softly work to resolve the harmonic viscosity. Eventually the note is facilitated to make an imperfect, merciful return, and the crisis between pitch and substance is finally resolved.
Audiobook details
GenreFantasy, General Fiction, Humor
Length4 hrs 26 mins
Narrated byGregory Dwyer
FormatAudiobook
Publish dateFeb 17, 2026
LanguageEnglish
Series
More from Otto Handley
The Story of GlenOtto Handley2h 35m$15
The Man Who Tried to Impress AristotleOtto Handley2h 17m$15
Escape into SentienceOtto Handley5h 37m$20
The Man Who Tried to Impress G. K. ChestertonOtto Handley2h 39m$15
Sliding into SinOtto Handley8h 6m$23
The Man Who Tried to Impress Jordan PetersonOtto Handley1h 29m$10
The Wombat UltimatumOtto Handley5h 35m$20
The Four Last ThingsOtto Handley5h 56m$20
A Papal EmulsificationOtto Handley5h$20
The Fryer AscendsOtto Handley3h 23m$20
Verbosity UnchainedOtto Handley7h 59m$23
Demon CopperheadBarbara Kingsolver21h 3m4.5 (949.4K)$46 · $0.00
Remarkably Bright CreaturesShelby Van Pelt11h 17m4.4 (1.7M)$29 · $0.00
Before the Coffee Gets Cold: A Toshikazu Kawaguchi Book SetToshikazu Kawaguchi18h 55m4.5 (1.4K)$40 · $0.00
The Song of AchillesMadeline Miller11h 15m4.3 (2.3M)$29 · $0.00
The Left and the LuckyWilly Vlautin6h 40m4.4 (1.1K)$24 · $0.00
Hunt of the DragonJuliette Cross9h 46m4.4 (736)$20
Deadly GameChristine Feehan13h 20m4.3 (15.8K)$30
Lola in the MirrorTrent Dalton13h 40m4.5 (43.9K)$33 · $0.00
Going PostalTerry Pratchett13h 36m4.5 (163.8K)$33 · $0.00
The Leo Tolstoy CollectionLeo Tolstoy9h 1m4.5 (4.9K)$12 · $0.00
Sword and ShadowMichelle Sagara16h 51m4.5 (2.2K)$40 · $0.00
A Tree Grows in BrooklynBetty Smith14h 55m4.4 (577.6K)$33 · $0.00
Dark GuardianChristine Feehan12h 32m4.5 (26.3K)$33 · $0.00
The Neil Gaiman ReaderNeil Gaiman27h 3m4.5 (3.2K)$53 · $0.00
The HobbitJ. R. R. Tolkien10h 51m4.4 (4.9M)$12 · $0.00
Bad HabitAlana S. Portero5h 37m4.4 (52.3K)$24 · $0.00
Science Fiction & Fantasy CollectionH. P. Lovecraft16h 32m4.5 (2.7K)$2 · $0.00
The Undead PoolKim Harrison16h 13m4.4 (34.6K)$33 · $0.00
The Edge of DawnBeverly Jenkins10h 15m4.5 (1.1K)$29 · $0.00
The Tapestry of FateShannon Chakraborty20h 2m4.4 (3.4K)$46 · $0.00
WhistlerAnn Patchett10h 45m4.6 (4.6K)$29 · $0.00
Demon CopperheadBarbara Kingsolver21h 3m4.5 (949.4K)$46 · $0.00
To Kill a MockingbirdHarper Lee12h 18m4.5 (7.4M)$29 · $0.00
Remarkably Bright CreaturesShelby Van Pelt11h 17m4.4 (1.7M)$29 · $0.00
Black History CollectionFrederick Douglass, Harriet Ann Jacobs, Booker T. Washington, W.E.B. Du Bois27h 9m4.6 (2.6K)$18 · $0.00
The Old Man and the Sea (Annotated)Ernest Hemingway4h 27m4.6 (1.4K)$2 · $0.00
White HotIlona Andrews13h 18m4.5 (136.9K)$5 · $0.00
The Ghost by the Billabong (The Matilda Saga, #5)Jackie French14h 58m4.6 (773)$33 · $0.00
Cast in BloodMichelle Sagara16h 35m4.6 (607)$33 · $0.00
The Captain Blood Trilogy (Annotated)Rafael Sabatini29h 20m4.6 (1K)$3 · $0.00
Ship of the Line (Annotated)Cecil Louis Troughton Smith11h 13m4.6 (1K)$2 · $0.00
The George Orwell CollectionGeorge Orwell24h 46m4.5 (14.4K)$12 · $0.00
Time RegainedMarcel Proust15h 38m4.5 (9.2K)$2 · $0.00
Driving ForceElle James4h 58m4.6 (407)$20 · $0.00
When God Calls the HeartBrian Bird, Michelle Cox3h 24m4.6 (439)$10 · $0.00
Five Little IndiansMichelle Good10h 34m4.5 (64.5K)$29 · $0.00
Lolth's WarriorR. A. Salvatore13h 20m4.6 (2.4K)$33 · $0.00
The Things We Cannot SayKelly Rimmer13h 48m4.5 (359.1K)$33 · $0.00
The Love Songs of W.E.B. Du BoisHonoree Fanonne Jeffers29h 49m4.5 (58K)$8 · $0.00
Going PostalTerry Pratchett11h 23m4.5 (189.9K)$29 · $0.00
Lost In TranslationAudrey Davis9h 15m4.4 (235)Free
Going PostalTerry Pratchett13h 36m4.5 (163.8K)$33 · $0.00
Woman UninterruptedBrodie Kane7h 1m4.6 (562)$24 · $0.00
1984 & Animal Farm (Annotated)George Orwell15h 54m4.5 (220.8K)$3.99 · $0.00
Kingsblood Royal (Annotated)Sinclair Lewis14h 42m4.6 (264)$2 · $0.00
This Is Going to HurtAdam Kay5h 47m4.4 (444.7K)$24 · $0.00
You Will Get Through This NightDaniel Howell6h 56m4.4 (11.8K)$24 · $0.00
Northanger Abbey (Annotated)Jane Austen10h 7m4.5 (1.6K)$2 · $0.00
My Dear HamiltonStephanie Dray, Laura Kamoie23h 7m4.4 (63.6K)$46 · $0.00
THE SCREWTAPE LETTERS & SCREWTAPE PROPOSES A TOAST (Annotated)C. S. Lewis5h 6m4.4 (471K)$2 · $0.00
BufferingHannah Hart5h 55m4.4 (12.4K)$24 · $0.00
The Office BFFsJenna Fischer, Angela Kinsey8h 26m4.3 (45.4K)$26 · $0.00
The Collected Stories of Dorothy ParkerDorothy Parker8h 36m4.3 (13.6K)$1 · $0.00
LambChristopher Moore15h 22m4.3 (211.3K)$33 · $0.00
#IMomSoHardKristin Hensley, Jen Smedley7h 19m4.3 (7.3K)$24 · $0.00
Mixed PlateJo Koy8h 18m4.3 (7.1K)$26 · $0.00
Over the TopJonathan Van Ness5h 50m4.3 (87.3K)$24 · $0.00
It Never EndsTom Scharpling8h 53m4.4 (2.3K)$20 · $0.00
The Importance of Being EarnestOscar Wilde2h 31m4.3 (475.9K)$1.20 · $0.00
More Tales of the CityArmistead Maupin8h 23m4.3 (22.6K)$26 · $0.00
You may also like
The Book Of LiesAleister Crowley2h 52m4.1 (5.9K)$2 · $0.00
Occult scienceRudolf Steiner11h 56m4.1 (1K)$4.70 · $0.00
The Hidden Side Of ThingsC. W. Leadbeater16h 56m4.3 (275)$1.20 · $0.00
The Way of InitiationRudolf Steiner3h 54m4.2 (2.4K)$1.20 · $0.00
Daughter from the DarkMarina & Sergey Dyachenko9h 59m3.8 (1.8K)$29 · $0.00
The Manifestation CodeRaimon Samsó4h 46m4.5 (496)$9.99
A Treatise on White MagicAlice Bailey22h 4m4.5 (368)$1 · $0.00
Think yourself RichAnthony Norvell6h 45m4.2 (493)$5.70 · $0.00
Hidden Symbolism of Alchemy and the Occult Arts (Annotated)Herbert Silberer12h 59m4.2 (388)$1.99 · $0.00
Thought-Force in Business and everyday LifeWilliam Walker Atkinson3h 15m4.2 (2.4K)$3.40 · $0.00
Knowledge of the higher worlds and its attainment (translated)by Rudolf Steiner6h 5m4.4 (3.3K)$4.70 · $0.00
Your Invisible PowerGeneviève Behrend4h 6m4.3 (5.2K)$1 · $0.00
The Book of LiesAleister Crowley1h 35m4.0 (6.1K)$5 · $0.00
A Treatise on White Magic: Fifteen RulesAlice Bailey22h 8m4.4 (583)$2.99 · $0.00
Money MagnetismNorvell6h 41m4.3 (285)$12 · $0.00
The Arcane Teachings of William Walker AtkinsonWilliam Walker Atkinson12h 25m4.2 (380)$2 · $0.00
The Prey of GodsNicky Drayden12h 27m3.9 (5.9K)$29 · $0.00
THE RED DRESSRUSSELL HARRIS53m4.3 (29) Only with Ultra
Body, Mind & Spirit and Mysticism – 6 Classic Spiritual TextsJakob Böhme, H. P. Blavatsky, Three Initiates, Rudolf Steiner, Kahlil Gibran, U. G. Krishnamurti43h 22m$1
Der Trickster, den sie riefLena Fuchs11h 50m$5