Audio only
Length8h 38m
About this audiobook
Kelly Oxford is . . .
A wunderkind producer of pirated stage productions for six-year-olds
Not the queen of the world
An underage schnitzel-house dishwasher
The kid who stood up to a bully and almost passed out from the resulting adrenaline rush
A born salesman
Capable of willing her eyesight to be 20/20
That girl who peed her pants in the gas station that one time
Totally an expert on strep throat
Incapable of making Leonardo DiCaprio her boyfriend
A writer
A certified therapy assistant who heals with Metallica mixtapes
"Not fat enough to be super snuggly." —Bea, age four
Not above using raspberry-studded sh*t to get out of a speeding ticket
"Bitingly funny. But everybody knows that." —Roger Ebert
Sad that David Copperfield doesn't own a falcon
A terrible liar
Audiobook details
Rating★★★★ 3.5 (9.6K)
Includes Goodreads, Amazon, StoryGraph, LibraryThing
GenreBiography and Memoir, Humor
Length8 hrs 38 mins
Narrated byKelly Oxford
FormatAudiobook
Publish dateApr 2, 2013
LanguageEnglish
More from Kelly Oxford
The Happiest Man on EarthEddie Jaku3h 48m4.6 (178K)$7 · $0.00
MotherlandJulia Ioffe17h 52m4.7 (2.5K)$40 · $0.00
Evidence Not SeenDarlene Deibler Rose11h 11m4.6 (11.9K)$29 · $0.00
Where Cowards Go to DieBenjamin Sledge8h 42m4.7 (351)$20 · $0.00
Will You Love Me?Cathy Glass9h 5m4.6 (9.3K)$29 · $0.00
Designing Terry Pratchett’s DiscworldPaul Kidby3h 52m4.7 (343)$20 · $0.00
HostageEli Sharabi5h 25m4.6 (10.8K)$24 · $0.00
Finding MeViola Davis9h 15m4.6 (256.4K)$29 · $0.00
The Dangerous Truth about Today’s MarijuanaLaura Stack CSP, MBA9h 57m4.7 (385)$20 · $0.00
Birdie & HarlowTaylor Wolfe7h 50m4.6 (6.5K)$26 · $0.00
The Lives of BrianBrian Johnson9h 45m4.6 (3.5K)$29 · $0.00
I Am The StormJanice Dean9h4.6 (1.5K)$8 · $0.00
Black History CollectionFrederick Douglass, Harriet Ann Jacobs, Booker T. Washington, W.E.B. Du Bois27h 9m4.6 (2.6K)$18 · $0.00
Just as I AmCicely Tyson16h 8m4.6 (99K)$33 · $0.00
Unbroken Bonds of BattleJohnny Joey Jones8h 31m4.6 (2.6K)$8 · $0.00
The Daughter of AuschwitzTova Friedman, Malcolm Brabant7h 54m4.6 (16.7K)$26 · $0.00
My Bondage and My Freedom (Annotated)Frederick Douglass15h 30m4.6 (2.4K)$2 · $0.00
Lily's PromiseLily Ebert, Dov Forman8h 54m4.6 (16.1K)$29 · $0.00
CrossroadsKaleb Dahlgren7h 56m4.6 (4.9K)$26 · $0.00
Across the RiverKent Babb11h 40m4.6 (927)$29 · $0.00
Lost In TranslationAudrey Davis9h 15m4.4 (235)Free
The Life of DaiDai Henwood, Jaquie Brown8h 2m4.6 (790)$26 · $0.00
Welcome to PawneeJim O'Heir6h 24m4.5 (5.3K)$24 · $0.00
Going PostalTerry Pratchett13h 36m4.5 (163.8K)$33 · $0.00
Woman UninterruptedBrodie Kane7h 1m4.6 (562)$24 · $0.00
1984 & Animal Farm (Annotated)George Orwell15h 54m4.5 (220.8K)$3.99 · $0.00
Kingsblood Royal (Annotated)Sinclair Lewis14h 42m4.6 (264)$2 · $0.00
This Is Going to HurtAdam Kay5h 47m4.4 (444.7K)$24 · $0.00
You Will Get Through This NightDaniel Howell6h 56m4.4 (11.8K)$24 · $0.00
Northanger Abbey (Annotated)Jane Austen10h 7m4.5 (1.6K)$2 · $0.00
My Dear HamiltonStephanie Dray, Laura Kamoie23h 7m4.4 (63.6K)$46 · $0.00
THE SCREWTAPE LETTERS & SCREWTAPE PROPOSES A TOAST (Annotated)C. S. Lewis5h 6m4.4 (471K)$2 · $0.00
BufferingHannah Hart5h 55m4.4 (12.4K)$24 · $0.00
The Office BFFsJenna Fischer, Angela Kinsey8h 26m4.3 (45.4K)$26 · $0.00
The Collected Stories of Dorothy ParkerDorothy Parker8h 36m4.3 (13.6K)$1 · $0.00
LambChristopher Moore15h 22m4.3 (211.3K)$33 · $0.00
The Importance of Being Earnest (World's Classics Series)Oscar Wilde4h 10m4.3 (467.3K)$1.99 · $0.00
#IMomSoHardKristin Hensley, Jen Smedley7h 19m4.3 (7.3K)$24 · $0.00
Mixed PlateJo Koy8h 18m4.3 (7.1K)$26 · $0.00
Over the TopJonathan Van Ness5h 50m4.3 (87.3K)$24 · $0.00
You may also like
Ramona and Her MotherBeverly Cleary2h 18m4.3 (33.7K)$16 · $0.00
Friendship List #4: 13 and 3/4Lisa Greenwald8h 15m4.5 (727)$26 · $0.00
Kicking & DreamingAnn Wilson, Nancy Wilson8h 51m4.2 (6K)$29 · $0.00
You're That BitchBretman Rock6h 26m4.3 (8.7K)$24 · $0.00
HOW I QUIT GOOGLE TO SELL SAMOSASMunaf Kapadia, Zahabia Rajkotwala, Zahabia Rajkotwala5h 26m4.4 (405)$24 · $0.00
RedSammy Hagar7h 26m4.2 (30.5K)$24 · $0.00
Fancy NancyJane O'Connor, Robin Preiss Glasser5m4.3 (37.3K)$4 · $0.00
Set the Boy FreeJohnny Marr9h 28m4.3 (9K)$29 · $0.00
Everything Is Perfect When You're a LiarKelly Oxford8h 38m3.7 (11.8K)$26 · $0.00
The Busy Life of Ernestine BuckmeisterLinda Ravin Lodding9m4.1 (340)$5 · $0.00
The ProfessorCharlotte Brontë10h 32m3.7 (38.6K)$4 · $0.00
Being BothSusan Katz Miller8h 33m4.1 (252)$20
Flat Stanley's Worldwide Adventures #13: The Midnight Ride of Flat Revere UnabriJeff Brown1h 12m4.2 (425)$13 · $0.00
Kick Up Some DustBernie Marcus7h 33m4.3 (569)$26 · $0.00
Double TakeKevin Michael Connolly4h 14m4.0 (1.9K)$20 · $0.00
The Ballad of Speedball BabyAli Smith6h 32m3.8 (147)$23
Cathalina at GreycliffHarriet Pyne Grove6h 4m$2 · $0.00
Still SalKevin Henkes2h 47m4.2 (218)$18 · $0.00
Life in the Key of GKenny G, Philip Lerman9h 45m4.3 (218)$23
Mavey & Beth’s Double Act: The Hole TruthKristy Nita Brown46m$8