Because We Are Bad
Audio only

Because We Are Bad

OCD and a Girl Lost in ThoughtBy Lily BaileyNarrated by Lily Bailey
Length5h 52m

About this audiobook

'Extremely compelling' –  THE GUARDIAN 'Remarkable'  –  WASHINGTON POST 'A beautifully-rendered memoir' – PUBLISHERS WEEKLY Because We Are Bad is a gripping, fast-paced non-fiction memoir that takes you inside the invisible war of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) — where a single intrusive thought can feel like a verdict, and where the mind insists that certainty is the only form of safety. From the outside, Lily is a bright, capable girl navigating school, friendships, and family life. On the inside, her days are governed by dread: unwanted images, taboo thoughts, sudden spikes of anxiety, and the persistent fear that thinking something "bad" means being bad. OCD is not neat, quirky, or harmless in this story. It is urgent, intelligent, and exhausting — an illness that hijacks logic, steals time, and makes ordinary moments feel dangerous. Written with razor-sharp clarity and literary elegance, Because We Are Bad has the pace of a thriller: a page-turning true story of rituals and mental compulsions, of moral panic and secret rules, of the desperate bargains made to keep disaster away. Lily Bailey captures the looping nature of obsession — the way intrusive thoughts return, mutate, and demand new answers — while showing how shame and silence can tighten the trap. This is narrative nonfiction at its most intimate: an OCD memoir that turns a private disorder into a vivid, cinematic reading experience. Yet this is not only a story of suffering. It is also a story of survival, insight, and recovery — the hard-won shift from fear-driven obedience to the possibility of freedom. With compassion and hard truth, Bailey traces how OCD distorts identity ("because we are bad"), and how naming the disorder can become the first step toward reclaiming the self. If you have ever lived with anxiety, panic, depression, perfectionism, rumination, or the crushing need to "get it right," you will recognise the emotional squeeze of a brain that refuses to let go. Inside this unforgettable mental health memoir, you'll hear: A vivid, honest portrait of life with OCD and intrusive thoughts, including the isolating pressure to appear "fine." The hidden mechanics of compulsions — checking, reassurance seeking, avoidance, mental reviewing — and how they can escalate in secret. A moving coming-of-age journey through fear, courage, family, and the complicated work of growing up with mental illness. A voice that is intelligent, humane, and fiercely readable: candid, darkly funny at times, and always compassionate. Because We Are Bad is essential for anyone searching for an OCD memoir, an obsessive-compulsive disorder autobiography, or a powerful mental health book that combines literary nonfiction with real-life urgency.  If you crave narrative non-fiction that is emotionally intense, psychologically precise, and impossible to put down, Lily Bailey delivers.  Because We Are Bad offers the rare combination of speed and depth: the propulsive momentum of a true life story and the enduring resonance of a book that changes how you see the mind.

Audiobook details

Rating★★★★ 4.3 (4.8K)
Includes Goodreads, Amazon, LibraryThing, StoryGraph
GenreHealth and Wellness, Biography and Memoir
Length5 hrs 52 mins
Narrated byLily Bailey
FormatAudiobook
Publish dateSep 15, 2018
LanguageEnglish

Table of contents

1Opening credits
1716. Those Who Love Me
21. Chesbury Hospital
1817. Thailand
32. My Friend
1918. Dublin
43. The Letter
2019. It Is My Fault
54. New School
2120. Mental Ward
Show all chapters
65. Mum and Dad
2221. Harley Street
76. Swearing in Church
2322. Urine Test
87. Most Apologetic Girl
2423. Loser, Friend
98. Hambledon
2524. Skating
109. Running from Words
2625. Ashleaves
1110. Stumbling
2726. Nursery
1211. Special Needs Department
2827. Journalism
1312. Coming Home
2928. Rocky
1413. Doctor, Doctor
3029. The Truth
1514. Pills, Pills, Pills
31Closing credits
1615. Driving
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