Where Is the Fire Extinguisher, and Why Am I Only Asking Now? - How to Prepare Your Home for Emergencies, Power Outages, and Other Surprises Before You Actually Need Plan B

By Max Paradox
Listen with Sir Michael Caine™ and 1,000+ voices
Length5h 7m

About this audiobook

The lights go out. Your phone has fourteen percent battery. The torch is on the phone, the useful numbers are on the phone and apparently your entire emergency strategy is also on the phone. Somewhere, you own a power bank. Whether it is charged belongs to a more philosophical discussion.   Where Is the Fire Extinguisher, and Why Am I Only Asking Now? is a practical guide to preparing your home for disruptions before they demand your full attention. Max Paradox explores power cuts, interrupted water supplies, heating problems, alarms, severe weather, lost internet access and the ordinary ways one failure can create several more.   The book begins with understanding the home and the people who live in it. What matters most if power or water stops? Where are the essential items? Who knows how to find the relevant information? A useful plan considers children, older relatives, animals and differing needs.   You will explore sensible supplies, accessible equipment, reliable information, shared responsibilities and arrangements for leaving home when staying is no longer safe. Buying an item is only one part of preparation. Knowing where it is, understanding its intended use and checking that it remains usable matter too.   Written with dry humour and familiar domestic scenes, this is for readers who want a workable Plan B without making emergency planning their entire personality. The aim is having fewer basic decisions left to invent in the dark.   This publication was prepared using tools that support the creative process, including artificial intelligence solutions. The final concept, structure and editing are the responsibility of the author.

Audiobook details

Rating★★★★★ 4.6 (167)
Includes Goodreads, Amazon
GenreOther
Length5 hrs 7 mins
Narrated byListen with 1,000+ voices
FormateBook with Audio
Publish dateOct 16, 2026
LanguageEnglish

Table of contents

1INTRO
2Chapter 1 - Don't Prepare for the Apocalypse
3Chapter 2 - Your Home Needs an Owner's Manual
4Chapter 3 - One Failure Likes to Bring Friends
5Chapter 4 - Don't Fix the World in the First Minute
Show all chapters
6Chapter 5 - Stock What You’ll Actually Use
7Chapter 6 - Buying It Does Not Train You
8Chapter 7 - Don’t Be the Only Person Who Knows
9Chapter 8 - Sometimes the Safe Plan Is to Leave
10Chapter 9 - When the House Goes Quiet
11Chapter 10 - When the Tap and the Heat Both Quit
12Chapter 11 - When the Alarm Means It
13Chapter 12 - Weather Does Not Check Your Calendar
14Chapter 13 - When the Internet Goes Quiet
15Chapter 14 - Switch to Minimum Mode
16Chapter 15 - When Plan B Has a Bad Day
17Chapter 16 - Your Home Does Not End at the Front Door
18Chapter 17 - Don’t Make Big Decisions on Empty
19Chapter 18 - Plans Age Quietly
20Chapter 19 - Practice Before Life Does It for You
21Chapter 20 - Ready Enough
Pracuję Dobrze, Ale Nikt Tego Nie Widzi - Jak budować widoczność swojej pracy, komunikować efekty i dbać o własną karierę bez zamieniania się w chodzącą prezentację sukcesówMax Paradox4h 44m4.5 (64)$7.70
The Building Association Raises the Repair Fund, and I Raise My Blood Pressure - How to Read Your Building's Budget, Ask Questions About Repairs, and Take Part in Building Decisions Without Voting Based Solely on the Latest Argument at the Owners' MeMax Paradox6h 47m$7.60
Dziecko Mówi Dwoma Językami, a Dziadkowie Mają Sto Teorii - Jak budować rodzinny plan używania języków, współpracować ze szkołą i wybierać rzetelne wsparcie bez robienia z każdej rozmowy egzaminu z dwujęzycznościMax Paradox6h 17m$7.60
My Bike Should Take Me to Work, Not Stand in the Hallway - How to Plan Your Route, Gear, Parking, and Bad-Weather Options, and Gradually Make Cycling Part of Your Everyday Commute Without Buying a Pro Cyclist Identity Along with Your HelmetMax Paradox6h 21m$7.60
Dzielimy Mieszkanie po Rodzicach i Każdy Ma Inny Kalkulator - Jak uzgadniać korzystanie z odziedziczonej nieruchomości, koszty i kierunek dalszych decyzji oraz przygotować się do mediacji bez rodzinnej licytacji na zasługiMax Paradox6h 18m$7.60
The Hearing Aid Didn't Fix Every Conversation - How to Agree on Communication Conditions with Loved Ones and Coworkers, Use Available Accommodations, and Stay Connected Without Pretending You Heard EverythingMax Paradox6h 25m$7.60
My Child Has an Allergy, and Everyone Has Good Advice and a Cookie - How to Agree on a Daily Safety Plan with Specialists, School, and Loved Ones, Share Instructions, and Organize Outings Without Explaining Everything from Scratch Every Time SomeoneMax Paradox6h 37m$7.60
I Can't Drive Anymore, but Life Is Still Twenty Kilometers Away - How to Organize Shopping, Appointments, and Social Connections After Giving Up Driving and Build a Transportation Support Network Without Letting Others Control Your Entire CalendarMax Paradox6h 30m$7.60
Nie Mogę Już Prowadzić, a Życie Nadal Jest Dwadzieścia Kilometrów Dalej - Jak zorganizować zakupy, wizyty i kontakty po rezygnacji z prowadzenia auta oraz stworzyć sieć transportowego wsparcia bez oddawania całego kalendarza innym ludziomMax Paradox6h 19m$7.60
W Domu Jest Trzydzieści Stopni, a Klimatyzacja Jest w Planach - Jak organizować mieszkanie, obowiązki i pomoc dla bardziej narażonych domowników podczas upałów oraz planować potrzebne dostosowania bez czekania na kolejne rekordowe latoMax Paradox5h 55m$7.60
My Child Has a Special Education Ruling, but the School Has Its Own Interpretation - How to Organize Recommendations, Prepare for Meetings, and Monitor Agreed Educational Accommodations Without Fighting a Daily Battle Over Every Need Your Child HasMax Paradox6h 37m$7.60
Nasze Dziecko Jest Pierwsze w Rodzinie, Które Idzie na Studia - Jak wspierać wybór uczelni, przeprowadzkę i samodzielność, poznawać akademickie zasady oraz rozmawiać o kosztach bez udawania rodzinnego doświadczenia, którego jeszcze nie maMax Paradox6h 7m$7.60
Woda Wyszła z Domu, a My Nadal Nie Wiemy, od Czego Zacząć - Jak uporządkować dokumentację szkód, zadania i dostępne wsparcie po zalaniu lub powodzi oraz planować powrót do codzienności bez podejmowania wszystkich decyzji pierwszego dniaMax Paradox6h 20m$7.60
Rodzice Się Rozwodzą, a Ja Mam Czterdzieści Lat - Jak nie zostać mediatorem, powiernikiem i kurierem pretensji, ustalić własne relacje z obojgiem rodziców oraz odnaleźć się w zmianie rodzinnego układuMax Paradox6h 12m4.6 (25)$7.60
The Heat Pump Is New, and I Still Don't Know What to Set - How to Gather Installation Documentation, Understand Basic Settings and Energy Consumption, and Work with Your Installer to Optimize Performance Without Experimenting with the Entire HeatingMax Paradox6h 31m$7.60
The Adult Child Moves Back Home and Brings Their Own Rulebook - How to Agree on Costs, Responsibilities, Privacy, and the Ground Rules for Living Together Again Without Recreating the Parent-and-Teenager DynamicMax Paradox6h 36m$7.60
Kupujemy Mieszkanie Razem, Ale Nie Jesteśmy Małżeństwem - Jak przygotować rozmowy o wkładach, odpowiedzialności i możliwym rozstaniu oraz zebrać pytania do specjalistów bez zakładania, że miłość zastępuje wszystkie ustaleniaMax Paradox6h 12m$7.60
Studiuję, Pracuję i Podobno To Ma Być Najlepszy Czas Życia - Jak łączyć wymagania uczelni z zarabianiem, planować sesję i szukać dostępnego wsparcia bez finansowania studiów wyłącznie własnym snemMax Paradox6h 28m$7.60
My Partner Is from Another Country, and Our Families Have Two Recipes for Everything - How to Navigate Traditions, Language, and Family Expectations as an Intercultural Couple Without Deciding Whose Family Is Right at Every HolidayMax Paradox6h 51m$7.60
My Father Has Fallen in Love Again, and I Have No Ready-Made Role for This - How to Talk to Your Parent About a New Relationship, Sort Through Your Emotions, and Build a Connection with His Partner Without Taking Responsibility for Other Adults' LiveMax Paradox6h 33m$7.60
The Holy Bible - 1 SamuelKing James2h 13m4.8 (1.6K)$3 · $0.00
The American Standard Bible — The Gospel of MatthewMatthew3h 56m4.7 (3K)$2 · $0.00
Bad Fat Black GirlSesali Bowen6h 32m4.7 (2.8K)$24 · $0.00
The King James Audio Bible New Testament CompleteChristopher Glyn20h 2m4.7 (2.6K)$10 · $0.00
Faiths CheckbookCharles Spurgeon12h 44m4.7 (3.2K)$11 · $0.00
Ten Things I Wish You Knew About Your Child's Mental HealthDr. Billy Garvey4h 53m4.7 (2.4K)$20 · $0.00
Designing Terry Pratchett’s DiscworldPaul Kidby3h 52m4.7 (343)$20 · $0.00
The Chosen Book OneAmanda Jenkins, Kristen Hendricks, Dallas Jenkins3h 8m4.6 (4.9K)$10 · $0.00
The Lives of BrianBrian Johnson9h 45m4.6 (3.5K)$29 · $0.00
Expository Thoughts on the Gospel of LukeJ.C. Ryle27h 13m4.7 (536)$18 · $0.00
CrossroadsKaleb Dahlgren7h 56m4.6 (4.9K)$26 · $0.00
Across the RiverKent Babb11h 40m4.6 (927)$29 · $0.00
Brain Training for RidersAndrea Monsarrat Waldo5h 56m4.7 (550)$19 · $0.00
My Effin' LifeGeddy Lee17h 11m4.6 (13.1K)$40 · $0.00
Kings and PawnsHoward Bryant10h 9m4.6 (678)$29 · $0.00
The Elementia Chronicles #2: The New OrderSean Fay Wolfe11h 17m4.6 (841)$29 · $0.00
The ActsLuke2h 55m4.6 (19.7K)$12 · $0.00
New Testament - Easy NavigationWorld English Bible19h 35m4.6 (1.3K)$1.30 · $0.00
Woodcraft and Camping (Annotated)George Washington Sears3h 30m4.6 (1.2K)$1.99 · $0.00
The Hate U GiveAngie Thomas11h 50m4.5 (1.1M)$8 · $0.00

You may also like

Round about a Pound a Week (Annotated)Mrs. Pember Reeves6h 17m4.1 (747)$1.99 · $0.00
The American Frugal Housewife: EssaysLydia Maria Child5h 27m3.8 (1.9K)$0.99 · $0.00
Modern Cookery For Private FamiliesEliza Acton31h 33m4.2 (299)$2.40
It's Thirty Degrees Indoors, and Air Conditioning Is Still on the Drawing Board - How to Organize Your Home, Daily Tasks, and Support for More Vulnerable Household Members During Heatwaves, and Plan Necessary Adaptations Without Waiting for Another RMax Paradox6h 26m$7.60
Mary S. Peake: The Colored Teacher at Fortress Monroe (Annotated)Lewis C. Lockwood1h 14m4.2 (23)$1.99 · $0.00
How to Create the Perfect Sleep Environment for Your BabyAurora Brooks50m$3.50 · $0.00
The Children of the PoorJacob A. Riis8h 39m3.6 (23)$2 · $0.00
Idaho Flagger and Traffic Control Study Guide 2026/2027Hollis Quarrington10h 6m$17
Dinner ClubH. C. McNeile7h 22m3.5 (28)$2.30
Baby Feeding Essentials- Must-Have Items for Every ParentAurora Brooks1h 19m$3.50 · $0.00
Practical Italian Recipes for American KitchensJulia Lovejoy Cuniberti1h 9m4.4 (11)$2 · $0.00
Preconception and Vaccines Are You Up to DateAurora Brooks1h 4m$3.50 · $0.00
Everything at Home Runs on Electricity. Until the First Outage - How to Identify Your Household's Dependence on Power, Prepare Alternative Ways to Communicate and Handle Everyday Tasks, and Plan Support for People Who Rely on Powered Devices WithoutMax Paradox6h 37m$7.60
Every Account Has a Different Password. In Theory - How to Organize Passwords, Logins, Backups, and Digital Security Before Another Password Reset Drives You MadMax Paradox8h 7m$7.70
The Revolutionary Product That Promises to Solve Your Baby's Sleep TroublesAurora Brooks59m$3.50 · $0.00
Tennessee Flagger and Traffic Control Study Guide 2026/2027Hollis Quarrington10h 19m$17
What to Do When Your Baby Starts Rejecting Bottle or BreastAurora Brooks1h 6m$3.50 · $0.00
Green Cleaning for DummiesElizabeth Goldsmith, Betsy Sheldon3h 35m3.2 (46)$18 · $0.00
Arkansas Motorcycle Permit & License Test Prep 2026/2027Tobias Vantreese11h 19m$15
Temas De Direito E SaúdeAdriano Marteleto Godinho; Ana Paula Correia De Albuquerque Da Costa; Tiago Cappi Janini3h 4m$5 · $0.00